The Slimy Salesperson by Ryan Pereus


I started RPMC in late 2014. It began with human-to-human prospect script writing and consulting. I thought I could contribute to the cold call dialogue because I seemed to not feel the negativity and dread that many others in the industry were experiencing. I was excited about the opportunity to speak with someone creatively and candidly, with the possibility of winning them over to the next step in the sales funnel.

Considering the other channels available for businesses to market their products or services – radio, tv, internet (all), mailers, or even PR – all of these channels are for the most part, rhetorical. There is no live reciprocation, calibrating, or conversational exchange with the prospect. Data must be collected, translated, and then evaluated before changes are made for the future.

With cold calling though, your feedback is immediate. There is little misinterpretation. So, I understand why people don’t like it — because the negative feedback is many times instantaneous. A simple “not interested,” to a hang up, to yelling is all possible, and it happens live. Exposure and vulnerability are at their max. There is no hiding behind a fancy animated figure selling cloud storage on youtube.

However, with this potential negativity comes opportunity. In no other channel do you have the ability to react and spin the feedback and objections presented by your possible customer. You have no better chance than in a one-on-one conversation to impress, streamline, and rectify bad interactions to inspire and influence in a different direction to move them along the sales funnel.

At RPMC, we thrive on these one-on-one interactions that have nothing but potential – infinite potential I might add. This is how and why RPMC was started after all. The title of this blog is “The Slimy Salesperson” and it derives from a conversation I had with one of my client’s prospects a few years back.  The conversation has everything to do with the efficacy of cold calling in the 21st century, and how the “human touch” is so necessary in marketing.

To give a little background, my job was to reach out to “C” level executives at organizations that may be in need of my client’s tool. The purpose of the call was to set up a demo to view the tool and its ability to help their organization.

The conversation went like this:


I attempted to contact Mitch, the decision maker I needed to reach.

When I called, his secr, Laura, picked up, and I asked for Mitch.


Me: Hello, is Mitch there?

Laura: No, I am sorry, does he know who you are and was he expecting your call?

Me: No he doesn’t know who I am, and he was not expecting my call, I am actually just a slimy salesman


Laura: Oh, is that so? What do you sell?

Me: We sell used cars with the odometer rolled back, so you can tell Mitch they all have low mileage. Just kidding…. Were a company that helps organizations such as yours to increase efficiency and effectiveness through a web-based scorecard and consulting service…..

Laura: You know, this is funny. Mitch actually might like this, but I think he may even like the slimy salesman thing more. Go ahead and leave him a message and make sure to tell him the slimy salesman called. [I leave him an oh-so slimy voicemail and wrote him an email regarding the demo]


[Voicemail on my machine] Mitch: Hello. I am calling for a slimy salesman. Apparently you were trying to sell me something slimy, and I wasn’t around to hear your pitch. Just calling back.


Me: Hello, Mitch, this is Ryan, the Slimy Salesman…

Mitch: ….Hello Ryan, finally good to talk with you. You know, your spiel was funny. I never really dial back calls like these, but I couldn’t resist yours after speaking with Laura and hearing your voicemail. After listening to the message, I went to your website, watched your video, and put your demo appointment in my calendar that you invited me to via email….. I just had a couple more questions for you before we meet…..     


“Wow!” I thought. “I can’t believe that actually worked. I guess this is how I am starting the rest of my calls (not really).”  Either way, I went ahead and confirmed the demo with my client that turned out to be a very positive lead.


After this conversation, it felt like the hundreds of calls I had made, both successful and unsuccessful I might add, seemed to come together into one common message – that a live, human voice adds to a value proposition. You aren’t just getting a great product or service, but a person, someone that can be trusted. By using humor and playfulness directed specifically to the person of interest, you stand out amongst the chatter and are able to deliver something worth listening to.

RPMC offers human-to-human lead generation via cold calling services, event marketing, script writing, consulting, and web and brand strategy. If interested in learning more, please call us at 267-571-7008, or visit us at

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